So while this NyQuil does it's magic, I'll type out some things on my mind lately.
Oh, it's not abuse if I'm sick.
Which I am.
:)
Everyday I live my life, but when it all comes down to it my life is simply a speck of time, a fragment of a fragment, not even noticeable on the cosmic scale.
But I still have problems, worries, cares, loves, emotions, and I have a tangible difference in the life of people around me.
That's why I can never quite not give a fuck about anything, but it is also why I can move on so quickly.
I never know what I want except when I do.
From here on out I will simply type and not stop typing even if I have nothing to say.
D was just crazy, never been there before, almost made it to the next level.
But I missed it and maybe for right now it is okay.
This girl is cool, real cool, how the hell do I compete with all those other Indie boys?
I'm no hipster.
I'm no Indie boy.
I really don't know what I am.
I just never will settle for anything less than something special.
Is that you? I barely could even start to say.
Where do I fit in the whole scale of anything?
I am out of place, stuck in a world of in-betweens.
Like that author said, I don't belong to English, though I belong nowhere else.
Webs of thought laid out before me.
Electricity and energy.
When i was up there it seemed like I was fighting for control.
Control of my existence, I felt like I had something I wanted to tell you all.
I need to learn more, I need to have that feeling again, but this time with something to say.
I have to continue to learn.
Well this hasn't helped at all.
My thoughts are too....blurry lately.
This needs to change.
I hope I dream tonight.
I am out of place, stuck in a world of in-betweens.
Like that author said, I don't belong to English, though I belong nowhere else.
Why do I keep this? Cause I look back.
I look back.
I guess I always talk about looking towards the future, my dreams, what is to come.
But I think looking back is just as important.
It lets you look at yourself and get to know the essence of who you really are based on past actions.
You can't hide from what you've done, as much as people try to.
Your soul is one I tried to engulf in flame.
Let you taste some of the fire that lives inside my heart.
Maybe it was too much, maybe too little.
In any case, it should have never happened.
I feel guilty knowing you love me more than I love you.
But I can do nothing about it.
I hope you get better, for both our souls.
But mostly for yours.
I look back.
I guess I always talk about looking towards the future, my dreams, what is to come.
But I think looking back is just as important.
It lets you look at yourself and get to know the essence of who you really are based on past actions.
You can't hide from what you've done, as much as people try to.
Your soul is one I tried to engulf in flame.
Let you taste some of the fire that lives inside my heart.
Maybe it was too much, maybe too little.
In any case, it should have never happened.
I feel guilty knowing you love me more than I love you.
But I can do nothing about it.
I hope you get better, for both our souls.
But mostly for yours.
Webs of thought laid out before me.
Electricity and energy.
When i was up there it seemed like I was fighting for control.
Control of my existence, I felt like I had something I wanted to tell you all.
I need to learn more, I need to have that feeling again, but this time with something to say.
I have to continue to learn.
Well this hasn't helped at all.
My thoughts are too....blurry lately.
This needs to change.
I hope I dream tonight.
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